Lifestyle | The Start of A New Chapter...

Sunday, 23 July 2017

Hello Lovelies!

This weekend I have found myself very much in the company of my own thoughts. I am the queen of over-thinkers anyway, but extremely dodgy internet connection, long country walks with Flossie and the absence of my boyfriend who’s away on a mini break have left me in a deep thought quarantine.

Life at the moment feels very much like one chapter has closed, and another has begun. After finishing my exams, I quickly got an internship in social media that has now been turned into a permanent job as a Marketing Assistant. My anxieties about getting a job, and more importantly fitting in at that job have suddenly flown out of the window and the pages of my life are turning over effortlessly. I will also graduate this Friday with a 2:1, and leave education for the first time in almost all my life behind me.

Now with graduation comes for many of us this fear that life will ebb us towards being someone we never wanted to be, a *deep breath now* actual grown up.

But for me I’ve found myself not so scared of adulthood but more this chapter of my life ending and all those memories of my childhood and teens being washed away. I can’t fight the feeling that I’m falling down a rabbit hole and all of my past is rushing away from me as I desperately try and grasp onto it with my fingertips.

As many of you know, my beautiful Shetland Sheepdog Molly passed away a few months ago, just before I started this internship. In a way she has come to symbolise my journey from a child to an adult. When we got Molly I was only about 10, an anxious child about to move to my secondary school with no possible anticipation of what life would throw at me over the years. Ever since we brought her into our family, she was one of the most important aspects of my life. Every time I was bored we would play, every time I was heartbroken we’d hug for hours and every night I’d tell her I loved her. That bond you have with your dog, is one that you can only ever understand if you’ve had a pet.

Of course a few weeks ago, we got our new Shetland sheepdog puppy, Flossie (Florence) Nightingale, named so because everyone asks us if we’re related to Florence Nightingale – we’re not by the way. Having her around has been such a joy, as any puppy is (minus the accidents and biting) and I have found myself feeling overwhelmingly that I am leaving an old chapter of my life behind.

I still do of course miss Molly every day, and there is not a day that goes by where I don’t look at photos of her and wish that she didn’t get so sick. But for once in my life everything else has unfolded as perfectly as I could’ve imagined. Perhaps life has realised I need a bit of a break, and decided to be kind.*

*Note that I don’t even believe in fate, but I still like to kind of believe it exists. Vicky Logic…

The only place where I feel I have started to not do so well is blogging. This July (the 15^th to be exact) marked three years of blogging. THREE WHOLE YEARS – can you quite believe that? And I’ve started to realise that I’m just not writing half as much as I used to. A lot of my effort has gone into Instagram, but I think it’s time to go back to writing more and getting inspired. I have fallen into the trap of feeling like everything I write is pointless, but it's time I got back my passion.

My final thought I’ll leave you with is that what we learn from life is that it is hardly ever plain sailing, and lord knows we’re lucky if we know the destination. If you’re struggling, know that the solution is only on the horizon, and that most of the time things don’t turn out how we expect but that’s totally ok.

Have a great weekend lovelies! Love Vicky x